nutritionist at Panera
This month, I met with my nutritionist, Sally South, at Panera Bread in McHenry.

There’s just no pleasing my nutritionist, Sally South, of Cornerstone Health Coaching Group. We met this week and I described some physical evidence of my dietary and healthy success. What did she do? She had the effrontery to ask me what I was going to do this month to further advance my health (we agreed that I would try to eat a vegetable this month – I had grilled jalapenos yesterday. That counts, right?).

So, getting back to the physical evidence of the success of the program Sally has me on, which might suggest that I should quit whining when she asks me to do more … NAH!

The physical evidence has to do with my pants. In particular, my jeans.

It’s time for me to order another pair of jeans. By ‘order’ I mean online; that’s where I go to buy my jeans. I used to buy my jeans in stores but not anymore. See, I discovered that the stores were playing a nasty practical joke with their jeans.

For years, I’ve purchased jeans marked ‘Regular’ as to the, what is it, cut, style or whatever. When they came out with the ‘Loose’ and ‘Relaxed’ fit, I called those ‘Baggy-_ ss’ jeans. I didn’t care for that and simply purchased the ‘Regular’ fit jeans I always wore and that I preferred.

One day, however, I noticed that my ‘Regular’ fit jeans were looking a tad baggier than I was accustomed to. I checked to make sure I hadn’t purchased the wrong style but, sure enough, they were marked ‘Regular.’

As time went by, it seemed to me that my pants were getting baggier and baggier. As I was about 50 at the time, I chalked this up to some kind of problem with the way I wore jeans. I resigned myself to the idea that, apparently, I just didn’t look as ‘cool’ in a pair of jeans as I always had (no snickering).

veggies jalapenos
Sally South challenged me to eat some vegetables this month. Here, at El Niagara in Woodstock with owner Herman Castaneda, I have a bowl of jalapenos. Whoa, I’m covered for this month.

This went on for quite a while until, one day, I decided that this just couldn’t be me; there had to be something terribly wrong with the jeans I was buying. So, I did some investigating. I discovered that, in fact, ‘Regular’ wasn’t ‘Regular’ at all, anymore. ‘Regular’ now meant ‘Baggy-_ss’ jeans that I could easily slide down my behind if I was inclined to show off the color of underwear I was wearing any particular day.

As I discovered their ‘little joke’ with the style, or cut, of jeans, I also discovered that most stores didn’t carry the style, or cut, of jeans I preferred. They carried ‘Regular,’ which wasn’t ‘Regular’ at all, and their carried ‘Relaxed’ and other forms of ‘Baggy-_ss’ jeans. I found that I had a serious quandary. Where was I to go to find the jeans I prefer.

The solution came to me online. I found a place called online. They have both kinds of clothes there – Country and Western. And they have jeans that fit the way jeans are supposed to fit – ‘Regular.’

Usually, I would simply go online and order another pair of ‘Regular’ jeans, which they call ‘Slim,’ from But, thanks to Sally and our nutritional program, I had a problem. In particular, my pants were getting loose. Not the way they messed up ‘Regular’ cut jeans but in the waist. In other words, I considered the possibility that I might have to move down a size in jeans. Up until now, working with Sally, I had only gone up in the size of my pants.

I wasn’t sure, however, if I was, in fact, ready for a smaller waist size in my jeans. My solution, before ordering jeans online, was to go to Big R in McHenry and try some on. This seemed a little unfair – trying on jeans with no intention of buying. So, after trying on a couple pairs to make sure, I gave the folks at Big R a chance to earn my business; I asked if they carried ‘Regular’ style jeans that were really ‘Regular.’

They didn’t and I ordered my pants from, as usual. Oh, and ordered one size smaller than I have been wearing.

‘Regular’ jeans just ain’t ‘Regular no more
Tagged on:         

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *